18th April 2010
From last week onwards I’s a bit busy on some official work to be done for my brother. So used to be outside most of the time otherwise as usual used to sleep whole and watched movies or chat with friends through out the evening hours. Even though have to go out for the work, still manage to take some time just to relaxed and play games on my PSP. It really helps to cool down my tension as well as work load.
Finally my brother work going too finished today so that I can have enough time to relax …. Ha ha ha just kidding. I love to work but don’t have enough opportunity back to my country. So I tried hard to be abroad no matter how……… just wants be some where. I’ve applied for the cruise as well………but have only slim chances to get that opportunity, so just wait for the result…….. Cross my finger and dream about it as well ha ha ha ……..
Oh I forget to mention something special about my marriage plan……… last week my sis called to inform that one of her known friends had return back from UK and intended to married with someone like my cast. So she asked me to meet her and talked as well. At that point I feel excited as well as feel shy to talk about it. So before we met, she wanna see me………… that’s ok. Let’s get together so that we can introduce each other and we’ll decide about it. Went to a restaurant with my sis and have conversation, laugh and glitter. So day after tomorrow we meet in a restaurant again just to know whether I’s interested to married with her or not. Up to that time I’s really positive about it, still positive but not sure whether she’s interested or not. I feel bad to asked her as well coz’ she’s going back to UK another day. Just have simple chat and walk our way…….. I don’t know what she thinks about me, but I know that she feel bored coz’ can see in her face…. Ha ha ha ha
Anyway whatever she thinks about me or not, I feel she got negative impression
So best of luck bro …..
Keep your finger cross and wait ha ah ah

Life takes an amazing turn in my life. I used to tell my friends and family that I won’t marry. I don’t have anything to give to her, I’s still trying to be someone and wanna stand on my foot so that I can support my family as well as fulfill my future wife desire. some more I’ve seen lots of trouble after marriage, some of them used to quarreled whenever they meet, some of them fight for a simple things, some even get into trouble from wife’s family, some of them take the wrong way addict of alcohol, drugs……. So I tried not to marry, may be coz’ of that I might chose wrong path just to tolerate. But after been though so many ups and downs in my life, finally decide to married.
For that also I’ve seen some positive side as well, after marriage some of them were live happily, living standard also went up, some of them leave the wrong way and tried to support the family. So right now I don’t have anything……….. hope after marriage my luck will change. Even though my family asked to marry as soon as possible so that I won’t chose the wrong way coz’ of frustration and loneliness. I know that’s true………………… even though without married, I won’t chose the wrong way just coz’ of frustration and loneliness. I can differentiate which way is wrong and right for my future…………………..
So right now I wanna get married, with some to get lucky. In our culture we’ve to marry whether u married early or late just the matter of time. We can’t sit with one decision, sometimes have to consider for the family, sometimes for our parents, but most of the time have to consider for the society. I hope after marriage she’ll help me to achieve my goals as well…. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ……. But when I’ll get married not sure lol… just looking for someone special who’ll understand my feelings and desires in my life…………………………..
Let’s hope………….

A true Friend

A true friend...
Never lets you down
Is always there when you need them around
Can see through your lies
Bringing you a surprise
Lifting you up
When you?re in a rut
Showing you the way life is
And always willing to let you raid their fridge
Brings you laughter
And makes you much happier
Stays up late to make sure you?re okay
And makes special calls in the morning to say
"I hope you have a great day!"
Lets you cry on their shoulder
And won't let your sunny days get colder
Will show you the light
Making sure that everything will be alright
Shares your gladness
And also your sadness
Won't leave you behind
And gives you most of their time
Will be honest and true
Letting you know exactly what they think of you
Won't turn away
When you need them to stay
Will never give up on you
No matter what you do
Helps you out when you just can't do it alone
And through it all... will stay strong as a stone

New Year Resolution

I will not throw the cat out the window

Or put a frog in my sister's bed

I will not tie my brother's shoelaces together

Nor jump from the roof of Dad's shed

I shall remember my aunt's next birthday

And tidy my room once a week

I'll not moan at Mum's cooking (Ugh! fish fingers again!)

Nor give her any more of my cheek.

I will not pick my nose if I can help it

I shall fold up my clothes, comb my hair,

I will say please and thank you (even when I don't mean it)

And never spit or shout or even swear.

I shall write each day in my diary

Try my hardest to be helpful at school

I shall help old ladies cross roads (even if they don't want to)

And when others are rude I'll stay cool.

I'll go to bed with the owls and be up with the larks

And close every door behind me

I shall squeeze from the bottom of every toothpaste tube

And stay where trouble can't find me.

I shall start again, turn over a new leaf,

leave my bad old ways forever

shall I start them this year, or next year

shall I sometime, or .....?

14th april 2010
Warm welcome to the upcoming New Year in our calendar that is 2076 according to Nepalese calendar. Time to make new resolution and plans for the whole year. Before making new resolution and plans, I would like to wish all of my friends ‘happy new year 2067i hope I’ll bring lots of happiness, good health, prosperity and fortune in your life. Hope you’ll have fun through out the whole year with your friends and family as well. Have a wonderful new year.’
Actually I’ve tried to consider about it as well, but can’t put my mind to do such things for the New Year. I tried to do some planning and resolution as well, planning is ok and every year I used to do it and try my best to achieve the goal as well but resolution…………… just can’t think about it. So I give up……………… oh yea I’ll try to quit smoking. Being true with myself it’s just like my good friends. Whenever I’s bored or feel alone, that’s the only thing which will give me company and also helps me to relax for a while with mental stress.
Last week, because of misunderstanding I’ve quarreled with some of my good friends with whom I used to share my feelings and thoughts as well. So now I don’t have anyone to talk and shared those thongs as well. Totally it’s not my fault, because most of the time I used to compromise my times and feeling just for them. Whenever they called or asked me for something I never say no, but last time as they request, went to meet them. We got plans to go outside……………. For travel and visit new places just like dry picnic for a day. When I reached there…… just start to make selfish request. Some of them told me got work, other told me if that person is not going than I can’t go because my mom and dad will scold me blah blah blah……….. I can’t tolerate anymore so that just drank some alcohol and put my words. Just ignore the consequences and takeout my anger to them. They didn’t think about my feelings and compromises what I’ve been through. Just see their self only………… the very next day called them with hope they will understand my feelings and anger as well, but all the hand phone were switched off. That means they don’t wanna keep any relation with me anymore. It’s ok…………….. you don’t wanna talk to me, that’s fine. I don’t need those selfish friends also. They thought that without them I don’t exist, but never realize without me………… they were nothing.
So right now just try to put that anger into words, I wish not to keep any relation with them anymore. I would rather die than to go back to them and plead for forgive my action.
So good bye to them……….

Have it All

The sun, the moon, the stars, the sky;
I have it all with one look in your eye.
The trees, mountains, water and mist;
I have it all in the simplest kiss.
Some people say, "you can't have it all,"
But I do every time you call.
Never have I felt quite like this;
I pray to stay your only Miss.
For without you, I fear, there is no me;
I just wish I could make you see...
how my feelings for you have continued to grow;
I'm happy, after so long, I finaly know...
Where I want to go and who I want to be;
I hope in the future it's just you and me.
I have it all when I have you,
and curse the day that it is through.
But I am thankful now, that I can say;
I have it all and it begins today.
Even if I am lost and don't know what to do;
you're still here and I love you.

I Love you all with my heart forever

Loving you is the best

Oh that I have to confess

Vast changes I have to hide

Eternal love held deep inside

You're the one all these feelings are for

Out comes my love forever more

Ultimate love for you

Wedding bells and Christmas too

Inside I have always felt

The love for you that I have dealt

Holding your hand in all that you do

Always telling you that I love you

Loving you for the rest of my life

Luckily I'll be able to call you my dear

my heart as it lies next to yours

Yes holding each other until

we can't take it anymore

Hoping that we'll make it through

Especially with all the love

I have for you

All that I really have to give

Respect and love for your life to live

Together there won't be anything wrongForever having our special songOur lives may not be the bestReady to put our love to the testEven if it may become tough Very special love will be enoughEvery day we'll be in love

Try....

I try to go on; I try to smile
I try to forget, but only for a short while.
I try to sleep and dream something new,
But it never fails...it's all about you.
I try to move on, small steps each day.
I try to chase away feelings that demand to stay.
I try to laugh and avoid the word, "WHY,"
But it ends just the same as I break down and cry.
I try to get involved in deep conversation.
I try to ignore that overwhelming sensation.
I try to be open and to love again,
But when the Heart is in battle, only TRUE LOVE can win.
Everything I do, everywhere I go,
Something recalls those memories I know.
It doesn't matter WHAT; it doesn't matter WHO,
But something sets off those wonders of you.
I need the Remedy for the pain of "GOODBYE."
I need to know how to do more...than just TRY.

About Love

I wrote a poem
about love
And the flames of
sunlight's piercing
rays.
Burnt it,
Consumed its passion
in jealousy.
For such love
is undeniable
And written, reveals
the truth of life.
I wrote a poem
that was consumed
In the heat of day's
burning.
A tale of passion
and of caring.
Of love caught
in the snares
of providence.
And born, never died
But lived like
the sun
Burning bright.
I wrote a poem
about enduring
love.
Of love's connivance
in a play.
A tragedy, a comedy,
a drama.
Above all... a romance
Of lives disparate
Thrown in a whirlwind
and spun
Through the air
In love.
I wrote a poem
so powerful
The sun consumed it
For fear, for fear
it would conquer
the world.
Of love in all its
dimensions,
Its shadows
caressing the earth.
And so my love
consumed
in the sun's passion
Was born again.

From My Heart

I'm without you

I'm so confused and lost

Searching for what to do

Still it's all a mystery

Why all this good

Hurts ever so bad

I wonder how Telling you

I will change

My head strong ways

Will undo all the pain

I need you in my arms Once again

How will I surviveWithout you

The hurt you feel

How can I ever take it all away

Yet you stay

Hold on to me tonight

Just one more time

If you ever doubt

For this one momment

Our love is not in vain

All I ever wanted to say is

I love you

Lost Love And a love lost

As I look at the sky,

it reminds me of your eyes,

When I listen, I hear your name

The one I love who's heart isn't tame

When I see a flying dove

I can't forget how much I love

The one and only you, baby you

When I relized I lost, my heart went blue

I've lost everything now

I might as well throw in the towel

Without you.. I'm nothing

With you.. I am something

I love you so much

words will never touch

These feelings I have for you

What can I do?

I want you in my life

I want you as my wife

Never to lose you

I'll promise with the words... I DO

\

Do u Remember

I want to kiss you,
but you're drinking.
That can change your mind,
the way you're thinking.
I want to make sure you remember,
so there's no awkward feelings the next day.
I can wake up knowing
you really wanted it this way.
Do you remember holding my hand
before you went to sleep that night?
Do you remember throwing me around?
We were playing, pretending to fight.
All these things,
I can't figure out if you remember.
I don't want to ask you,
I'm so shy.
If you only knew about
the things you do,
If only I could ask you,
Do you remember?